Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Pyjama sunrise and other stories



Boys skimming stones

The sun dips low behind the mountain. We’re in soft shadow on the riverbank – near the bridge – where it’s deep and tranquil – a little way from the gurgling. From here the pass winds steep through forest. Scott sits with his feet in the water and his heart and soul unquestionably fully in the moment. Intensely at ease. Throwing pebbles into the quiet rippling amber. Cam hurls with fervour anything he finds – gravel – boulders – tar washed down with the floods. Murray throws stones clear across the river – countless schoolboy hours on cricket fields bearing fruit in the unmitigated awe on the faces of his sons. Then he skims stones and the admiration swells with every light skip of rock walking on water. I pick up stones too and I throw like a girl. Plop. Murray says nice things about my throwing anyway. No one is hungry or tired or cold or bored. I’m still and I know He is God. 




Pyjama sunrise

God’s mercies are new every morning because Scott’s clock doesn’t have a holiday setting and he’s still up at 5:00 but the blonde curls and the wide blue pools of earnest and eager are irresistible all over again and I’m dragged happy to the lounge. Cam joins us – woken by sleepy stories half-read and intermittent dinosaur noises. He’s drowsy in wild loud spaceship pyjamas. Scott hurtles to hug him. I decide to redeem the ludicrous earliness by putting on slippers and sweaters – whisper to Murray (still in denial) we’ll be back – take them to the beach for sunrise. We’re all fighting flu and I forget the tissues so there’s a lot of sniffing but the cold sand and the dawn are quite bewilderingly beautiful under shreds of torn grey sky masking the pink of morning rising in a whisper against the relentless crash of foam on shore. The mountains roar of glory. It echoes back from endless blue.


Cam

We’re afternoon snoozing. He comes into the room. Furtive smile amidst freckles. Climbs on the bed. Burrows between us. He’s all serious business and chuffed and feeling the privilege of this warm space. Says, ‘I want to talk to you two about a few things…’

Scott

He tells me wide-eyed, ‘Whale spat Jonah OUT!’ [Aggressive spitting actions] Then he sings – head cocked cherub-like – chubby arms wrapped round his middle – say to the Lord I love you… Then he’s marching – ‘Come guys! Follow me!’ – arms swinging legs lifting whole face beaming. Brandishing brave pirate sword – ‘Aaargh!’ He insists on grownup cutlery. Takes his plate to the sink after meals – ‘Nuff. Thank you lunch Mommy.’ He still sometimes calls me in the night – hugs tight and rambles sleepy about baby cows or the beach. Blue skies or drizzle he announces daily, elated, ‘It’s a lovely day!’

 (Cam took the above photo of Scott)







Tuesday, March 5, 2013

A letter to Cam, because he’s wonderful.


My Cam,

So many things make you wonderful.

You’re wonderful because I can pretty much trust you to shower and pyjamarize all by yourself. I discovered last night that I can also trust you to spray linen mist in your armpits.

You’re wonderful because today you designed an underwater lake. Access was through a secret tunnel in the floor near the dining room table. A special design feature included a super-tube into a pool, ‘for people who follow Jesus and want to get baptised properly.’

You’re wonderful because you stop whatever you’re doing to let Scott hug you.

You’re wonderful because you helped Dad make the broom cupboard.

You’re wonderful because you’re totally into Gummi Bears and you preface your statements with, ‘Behold! I shall magically slice my mango / pass you the shampoo / get Scott out the bath, etc.’

You’re wonderful because today you spent an hour at the Pretoria Eye Institute enduring a battery of up-close-and-personal bright lights and cameras because the pressure in your left eye is worryingly high and you’re a glaucoma conference paper waiting to be written. You were quite excited to be there. And patient and cooperative. Exhausted by the end of it but unwaveringly polite. Uncle Jacobus (Dr Pauw) and Dad agree that you’ll have to have another examination under anaesthetic, so they can check out your optic nerve. But they are pretty optimistic that the raised pressure is because your corneas are much thicker than normal – a normal result of cataract surgery. Still, the whole thing left me flat and sad and like I don’t have the energy to face the fears anymore. And you’re wonderful because you made me pretend-pretend tea in the plastic cups in the waiting room.

You’re wonderful because I got impatient with you this afternoon when you were colouring in a bunny for Teacher Karen – badly. As in, you’re not trying your best come on now blah blah. Then I asked your forgiveness because I remembered that we’d dilated your pupils at the Institute so of course you were battling to see more than usual. With characteristic cheer and irrepressible optimism you said, ‘It’s ok Mom; I forgive you. My eyes are just a bit blurry but they’ll clear soon!’

You’re wonderful because you are wonderfully made – wondrous – wonder-filled – always wondering. And a living God-glory echo of the psalmist: For You are the fountain of life, the light by which we see. (Psalm 36:9)

All my love to you, sleeping child of mine,

Mom

Xx


Friday afternoon madness involving formidable quantities of icing and hundreds and thousands of hundreds and thousands…